She keeps asking about each and every minute objects at home. When I try to take something from the store room, she comes rushing to enquire what I am doing there! Earlier in my childhood days I was scared to go to our kitchen. She will be there around to check my movements. Although later I recognized her shouting was for my safety, kitchen became a matter of fear for me. I could get over this fright only recently. Now I am comfortable to work in kitchen as I know I can reply back to her in the same tone. Yet she is the ruler at my home even now.
Yet I know she is the only creature with whom I can talk in the day time. Being a member of orthodox Brahmin family, so many restrictions bind me. Even if I break that and talk to the neighbors, they withdraw themselves from interacting with me as it is what they were forced to practice for centuries. I’ve always dreamed of a life without religion or gender difference. Every thought of mine ends up in gender difference these days. My brothers are going for a tour this weekend without me for a simple reason that I am a female. Except in the metros, India is still a country where you can go for a picnic with same genders unless it is a family trip. And mostly girls do not go for excursions because every parent fears the so called security of females.
Even while I know everything cannot be changed in one day, scribbling my thoughts give me a relief. Writing is my refreshment; in fact that is the only thing for me to unwind these days! Now I am relieved and so let me get back to my work of writing travel articles. Though it is a part of my earning, I like it because at least through words I can travel to some of the most beautiful places on earth without a female label.