Saturday, April 30, 2016

My Devotion

Holding my thoughts, I prayed a second before scribbling. I am not a devotee who fixes time for prayers and sit in front of lighted lamps with closed eyes. Mostly those who do all these might not be able to concentrate for the whole time being. Their mind would wander through all gossips they have listened to for the whole day.

My concept of prayer is serene and quiet. I can do it even while having a piece of watermelon. It is just a divine communication between me and the Almighty. For that I need no hymns or music. In fact silence is what I love during prayers. Also I don’t believe that dumping money in devotional places will please God and would give extra blessings. Instead, give it poor people. At least offer them money for a meal. Or else, give food and water to birds and animals. Similarly, water plants that are about to die. Everything around you is creation of God. Life is about offering little things that could delight others. That’s the true devotion I believe.

Thursday, February 11, 2016

Let Not Be A Melancholy

Nostalgia… My favorite word in English! I’m fond of everything around. Memories of village, aroma of first downpour, film songs of my childhood days, mangoes, jackfruits, cows, rice field, river, creeks… what not! I fear if my blog’s name would come as the last item in my list of reminiscence. Writing has turned out to be a task.

‘You think in Malayalam and write in English. Better quit that habit. You should do both in same language’, my brother in law once advised me. Yeah true! Working for a daily that uses your mother tongue is really easy. Is it? Even it is tough at times. Yet we are more flexible compared to a language that you’ve learned by reading, writing and speaking.

Sincerely speaking, I lost my touch in English. Hard it is to scribble a few words. Moreover I’m  very much concerned about grammatical errors though a few of them will be spotted by MS Word itself. The flow I had three years ago is missing now. But the likes for my Facebook page is increasing day by day. Also when I attend any function, people keep asking what happened to ‘village girl’. Don’t think I am boasting. This is a platform I nurtured from nothing. I built it with words, feelings and experiences. I kept torturing people to read. Many ran away just like when you meet insurance policy agents. When the whole thing became silent, I realized there is still a handful left who read this blog seriously.

Village and greenery were my energizers. Today I am far away from both. I sit in my room in my night gowns and try to type a few group of words. I’ve kept my phones silent. I’ve learned the art of imagining so that I’d feel the smell of fresh leaves, chirping of little birds and the soothing wind even if the actual sounds around me is that of tile cutters, hammers and earth movers.

I wish to write more and more, update every now and then. Laziness and tight schedules make a fuss of everything. No more fake promises. This is the world I live, lived and will be living with my real self!

Thursday, October 15, 2015

Language Lost And Found

Photo courtesy: Daily Mail

The language once I admired, the letters with which I gambled my emotions, is strange to me. With so much of pain, I realize that the flow in my writings had disappeared. Although I look up to Malayalam more than English, the so called universal language always remain as my favorite.

Now you will be wondering how could I conclude so! Well, blogging and actual writing differs a lot. Here no one mind to correct or criticize. All we do is give positive comments. Even if I receive some personal messages regarding the mistakes I make here, most of my readers tend to give a thumbs up. It is not that I blame you. Initially, I enjoyed positive feedback and thought everything I post are perfect copies. Recently a blogger as well as my colleague pointed out a fact. He said blogging is a world of praises. I didn't take it seriously then. But when I was asked to write a few essays in journalistic language, I failed bitterly. I felt as if the world has gone blank. My love for this language has suddenly disappeared.

I made a self criticism. These are the faults I found in me:
  • I don't read much English newspapers. Working in a Malayalam daily was my excuse
  • I've taken a new year resolution which is to update my English blog regularly. It didn't happen. I blamed time.
  • I rarely went through English books and blogs these days. Again, time is the villain

Now, the solutions follow:
  • I've started reading English news websites
  • Posting one article a week is still a dream. Hope to make it happen by next year somehow
  • Beginning with Sigmund Freud's 'Interpretation of Dreams' I'm going to be a regular reader at least of e-books